Before I get into a description of what vitality is, and then how we can improve and build this in our lives, I want to pique your interest first: To achieve any goal in your life - weight loss, improved health, lowered blood pressure, ideal cholesterol (ANY-goal) - you must have abundant energy. Considering that “energy” is the substance that makes up every living (and non-living) thing in the Universe, when you have more energy inside you, you theoretically have the entire Universe inside of you. From there it is then possible to call forth and create what you want using a law of the Universe. This law of the Universe is frequently called The Law of Attraction and is publicized in The Secret. This law states that whatever you think about most, you will draw to you. However, in my experience this does not always work and I’d like to explain why with a metaphor: Imagine you had two magnets - one very large, industrial strength, and the other is simply a primary school science lesson magnet (not strong at all). Now, both of these magnets have magnetic potential and they will attract things to them, unconditionally. However it is the strength of the magneticism (energy) that will determine how much they can attract to them. You are the magnet. You possess energy - some people possess more than others - and if you decided to, you could attract anything to you. But to reiterate, you must first have abundant energy. I chose to write this post because many people wonder what exactly “vitality” means. Well it has two meanings for me: health (and all areas of life that contribute to health), and “energy.” When you are more vital and healthy, and you have filled your own cup up to the point that you are abundant with magneticism, you will indeed have more energy. Only when you have more energy will you achieve your ideal body, perfect health, your ideal partner, the dream job, *fill in the blanks*! So, how do we build it, and increase our energy flows? Through living principles of a healthy lifestyle. Then, and only then, can you achieve what you are after AND be happy when you have it. This “be happy when you have it” is important since many people spend all of their energy to achieve a goal (working long hours to make more money), and then have no energy left to enjoy it (depression, anxiety, heartaches, etc.). So what we need is to design our lifestyles in accordance with all of our core values, balancing our energy expenditure and our energy income. Ask yourself the following questions to get a little closer to building your own energy levels up to the point where you can achieve anything in your life: I help all of my personal clients answer these questions, and many more, to design a lifestyle of their dreams that allows for balance without compromising their goals they desire to achieve. To start being healthy today, increasing your energy, and achieving whatever you put your mind to (and enjoying it!), subscribe to my newsletter, and you will get access to my health guides based on the six foundational, modifiable factors of health and vitality. You must master these first. Let me know how you get on, below. Good luck!
While the disappearance of hunger is almost instantaneous after you start eating, the arrival of pleasant fullness takes some time. The less you eat during the time that it takes the stomach to notify your brain that it is full, the less you will overeat. The solution is obvious: slow down. Pace-Eating: Half-by-5 and All-by-10 Schedules When we eat, we tend to eat the entire portion. This kind of eating doesn’t factor in the delay between your stomach’s knowing you are full and your brain’s knowing you are full. As a result, we overeat (by eating beyond the point of pleasant fullness). The following are two pace-eating schedules based on the idea that the more you eat in the first sitting, the longer you should wait before you eat again. Half-by-5: divide the portion in half, eat the first half, and take a five minute break. If still not pleasantly full, eat the remainder of the food. All-by-10: eat all that’s in front of you. Wait ten minutes. If still not pleasantly full, have a second helping. For habit-modifying effect, apply the pace-eating schedule of your choice to the largest meal of the day. Rest Your Hands Technique Resting your hands between bites will help you slow down the pace of eating to give fullness time to emerge. Lay down the utensils, rest your hands on the table for 10-20 seconds. No need to keep track of time. Just a simple touch-down of your hands on the tablecloth. If you eat alone, or are not afraid of coming across as a bit eccentric, try the following. Get two tiny touch bells and put them on each side of the dish. When you rest your hands, you’ll hear a ring tone as your hands touch the bells. What shall you do during the pause. Take a breath and listen to the sound fade. Wait to eat another bite until the sound of the bell has faded into silence. Inverted Eating Race When eating with a like-minded mindful-eating partner, try to outdo each other in how slowly you can finish the meal. Fill in the pauses with talk. The loser pays the bill. Instead of leaving room for dessert, leave some room for conversation. The Admittedly Annoying Thorough Chewing Exercise One of the commonly overlooked phases of digestion is chewing. Chewing takes time, and time facilitates fullness. Conscious chewing is a good way to slow down eating to give fullness time to emerge. Some writers recommend chewing for a certain number of reps; but that feels too much like exercise. I suggest you study chewing. What side of the mouth do you chew on? What’s your natural average number of chewing motions per bite? What’s it like to have food in the mouth and not chew, just letting it sit there for a moment. How do you decide when you have chewed enough and it’s time to swallow? Let’s chew on that for a couple of weeks. Slow Eating Record Buy a bag of Hershey kisses. Take one out. Stow the rest away. Now that you have only one Hershey kiss, make this kiss last. Make love to it the way you would to the lips of a parting partner. Kiss it good-bye. Let your tongue slow-dance, gradually unlocking the nuances of the flavor. Of course, you can’t always freeze-frame in this type of gusto-sensual reverie when you eat. But, at least, set the record straight: you can slow-eat when you choose to. Counting the Chips How long does an average bag of chips last when you are vegging in front of TV? How long is it before your finger run into the disappointment of broken chip fragments at the bottom of the bag? Try something different: count the chips. First look at the bag of chips and make a prediction. Then count the chips as you eat them. If you are not going to finish the bag, jot down the number on the bag with a marker and continue counting when you come back to this bag of chips during your next “snack attack.” Compare the actual results with your prediction. Even if there were not as many chips as you thought there might be, I am sure that the experience of counting the chips would certainly help you slow down and would help you prevent a sense of disappointment. Apply this counting tactic to other finger-food snacks and sweets. For example, make a guess of how many raisins or almonds you’d find in your particular bag of trail mix. Count them up or risk inhaling countless calories without a sense of fulfillment. Reminiscence Eating Eating links people, places and things of our pasts, and as such, can be a great way of going down memory lane, on a journey of self-remembering. Reminiscent eating is an opportunity to turn a simple act of eating into an existentially meaningful experience with the added advantage of slowing down the process of eating (and thus giving fullness time to emerge). Next time you eat, look at the food in front of you and allow yourself to free-associate about the past. What does this dish, this smell, this taste remind you of? Give yourself a taste of the past and turn what could have been mechanical and meaningless into sentimental and mindful. A Cooling Off Period Think of the times you burnt your lips on a bowl of soup: isn’t it amazing that we are in such a rush to eat we are willing to burn ourselves?! Next time you have a bowl of soup in front of you give it a few moments to cool off. Stir it, mindfully, watching the vortex of colors swirl. Gently blow air on it, unlocking the aroma. Look around. Enjoy the wait, exhale the impatience, chill. Pavel Somov, Ph.D, EATING THE MOMENT: 141 Mindful Practices to Overcome Overeating One Meal at a Time (New Harbinger, 2008)
I recently attended a party with all of these products for sex. I have never used any toys although the hostess said everyone does. Still I have no idea where to start. Can you tell me what kinds of toys are good for beginners? What do men like vs women? Thanks. This is a great question and one that many people have when they attend an intimacy party for the first time. Vibrators of all kinds show up at these parties and the one warning I would give is to know that just like, ingredients that make up lubricant, some vibrators are healthier than others. By far the biggest category of adult products, after pornography, is the production and sale of vibrating toys. The majority, over 70 percent are made in China and sold all over the world with a remarkable lack of oversight. A report in 2001 by CBC suggested that the North American market alone is worth $400 to $500 million. It is safe to say though, that adult novelties are products that everyone wants, but no one is really willing to talk about. European studies of adult toys have shown extremely high levels of off- gassing of dangerous chemicals like phthalates in very high concentrations and that even in small levels have been linked to cancer and damage of the reproductive system. Being an intelligent and conscious consumer of adult products is an absolute necessity in this unregulated market- so please consider this a health warning and ask about the ingredients and the coating on the soft jelly and “cyber skin” items which are popular and often made with cheap PVC. As bad as these ingredients may be for the environment, they are even worse for sensitive tissue. Interestingly, recent studies have shown that over 50 percent of the population use vibrators, both male and female and they are widely recommended by physicians and therapists for a wide range of sexual dysfunction. Vibrators are a great toy for beginners to experienced lovers alike and are positively associated with an increase in pleasure for both genders. When it comes to shape, size and function, the sky is literally the limit. Trying vibrators that can be used both internally and externally is a good idea. Most vibrators that a woman enjoy can also be used by male partners as well. Considering a vibrator purchase, know like in most areas you get what you pay for. I have been selling and raving about Lelo pleasure objects for years. They are by far the Cadillac of vibrators and charge like a cell phone. In a wide range of styles and colors, there is sure to be a fit for any woman. I never get complaints and the products are guaranteed for a year. Another new toy that was voted toy of the year is the We-Vibe. Stimulating both interior and exterior simultaneously and allowing enough room for intercourse at the same time, speaks highly of the sophisticated Canadian engineering and imagination behind the toy. We can’t keep them on the shelf. Additionally the book that I recommend and sell the most about the topic would be Violet Blue’s The Adventurous Couple’s Guide to Sex Toys which is without question provides the most comprehensive overview of everything you ever wondered about sex toys and probably more. It’s a remarkably diverse and wacky world in sex toy land…enjoy the journey. Wendy Strgar is a loveologist who writes and lectures on Making Love Sustainable, a green philosophy of relationships which teaches the importance of valuing the renewable resources of love and family. She helps couples tackle the questions and concerns of intimacy and relationships, providing honest answers and innovative advice. Wendy lives in Eugene, Oregon with her husband, a psychiatrist, and their four children ages 11-20
Feeling weary or down in the dumps? Or perhaps you’re just looking for a psychological boost. The fragrance of essential oils may be just the pick-me-up you need. It’s common knowledge that smell effects how we feel. What we consider as “good” smells can lift our spirits, while “bad” smells can drag us down or even agitate us. In fact, the French word sentir means “to smell” and “to feel.” We tend to “feel” scents rather than logically process them—understanding them more through associations and images than by analytical methods. This is because the human brain processes smells in its limbic region, which appears to be primarily responsible for our emotions. Interestingly, the limbic system is often called the rhinencephalon or “smell part” of the brain. Several studies show that emotion and odors are directly linked and have been found to produce some of the same electrical impulses. Essential oils contain natural phytochemicals that impact the limbic system. When you inhale the scent of an oil, the brain releases various neurochemicals to create physiological changes in body, mind and spirit. When you smell lavender, for example, serotonin gets released, producing a calming influence in the body. Pure essential oils are extracted directly from plant parts, including flowers, leaves, stems and roots, as well as the rind of their fruits. Outside of their direct healing properties these oils simply smell good, make us feel happier and serve as great stress and pain relievers. The easiest and most common way to benefit from their essence is through aromatherapy—placing a few drops of diluted oil directly on your skin and inhaling the aroma. (Note: always cut the essential oil with a base oil—see suggestions below.) Or you can add drops to your bath or to a special aromatherapy diffuser, which heats the oil and allows the smell to permeate the room. Choose from a multitude of oils, ranging from bergamot (Citrus bergamia), which has a balancing effect, to sandalwood (Santalum album), which is known for its sensuous properties.
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